Monthly Archives: May 2014

Pie is Bad!

While this topic isn’t exactly frivolous, it is something I’ve been thinking about and trying to live by for awhile, so I thought get it out there.

I’ve realized that in life, people tend to fall into two categories, pie chart people and bar graph people.

Pie people see everything in absolute terms with regards to themselves. For them, the good things in life are a finite resource. Do you have a story? Theirs is better! Does everyone find that other person interesting? That person is boring compared to them! Forget about celebrating around these folks…they can only be happy for someone if they can still feel superior.

Even if say, it’s a birthday pie, and therefore the birthday boy/girl gets a larger piece, it’s always more fun if he and she is willing to take a “slightly” smaller piece so everyone can have some, right?

Did anyone ever like the kid who was unwilling to share because it was his/her special day?

No. Because that kid was an asshole and his/her parents failed.

(I’ll pause right here for you guys to imagine your own personal pie people)

Bar graph people see their own happiness as disconnected from others. Someone else’s success has no bearing on their own. Everyone has their own awesome pie! Let’s share some pie!

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In case you can’t tell, I like bar people better. *

We can all be pie people once in awhile; it’s human to feel a bit of a sting when we hear about someone having success in an area in which we’re struggling.

But only in rare instances in life does a bigger piece of happiness for someone meansĀ a smaller piece for you. Like if you were competing with your friend for the same girl or guy, or the same job.

(To keep this reasonably frivolous, let’s try to keep this to people in your own personal circle, and not CEOs, politicians, and celebrities.)

Even pie people prefer bar people. After all, they’re unlikely to get the admiration they crave from other pie people; admiration also consideredĀ a finite resource. Pie folks are also the absolute first in noticing that someone else got a bigger piece, while conveniently forgetting all the times when they ate the entire damn pie.

The bottom line being, this might be the only situation where pie is a bad thing.

*this analogy also works with a line graph.

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